Change

Every one of us living a sober life has made a major change. It wasn’t easy – and it won’t be the last change we’ll ever need to make.

If you are considering another change that will enhance your life, here are ways to embrace it:

• Be patient. Change may make you uncomfortable. If the change isn’t dangerous or harmful to you, your sobriety or other people, try to wait out the discomfort.
  
  
• Eat the elephant bite by bite. Switching hot sauce brands can be done quickly, but changing habits or relationships requires more work. Divide your goal into attainable steps that move you closer to the change you seek.
  
  
• Appreciate your life. Be grateful for what you have, even as you seek to make a change.
  

Effort

During our addictive years, it was a common practice to work things backward. We were known to eat our dessert before our main meal, to celebrate before we won, to assume the outcome before the event.

The problem with this behavior is that it takes no account of reality. Things move from beginning to end. The alphabet reads from A to Z. This seems so simple, but it can be tricky for people who are used to taking shortcuts. Our program is best utilized by starting with Step One

Boundary setting

 There is a positive aspect to boundary setting. We learn to listen to ourselves and identify what hurts us and what we don’t like. But we also learn to identify what feels good.

When we are willing to take some risks and begin actively doing so, we will enhance the quality of our life. What do we like? What feels good? What brings us pleasure? Whose company do we enjoy? What helps us to feel good in the morning? What’s a real treat in our life? What are the small, daily activities that make us feel nurtured and cared for?

Our fears

Our fears lock us up if we let them. They can prevent us from tasting adventure, from experiencing new wonders. We are often terrified of unknowns and fret about what might happen if we try something new. We worry if new people will like us—if we'll fit in.

It is natural to be cautious about the unknown, and anything new is just that. But we can keep our caution from becoming fear by taking action, with the faith that we never encounter anything we can't handle in some way.

Unknowns are merely joys we haven't met. We hold the keys to our own cages and can free ourselves when we use our courage and inner strength to overcome our fears.

What new joy can I discover beneath my fear today?

 

Serenity Prayer broke down..

God grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change. Many times—yesterday, last week, today, and even tomorrow—we'll come face-to-face with a seemingly intolerable situation. The compulsion to change the situation, to demand that another person change the situation, is great. What a hard lesson it is to learn we can change only ourselves! The hidden gift in this lesson is that as our activities change, often the intolerable situations do, too.

Acceptance, after a time, smooths all the ripples that discourage us. And it softens us. It nurtures wisdom. It attracts joy and love from others. Ironically, we often try to force changes that we think will "loosen" love and lessen struggle. Acceptance can do what our willpower could never accomplish.