A boy once asked his grandfather how he had become so happy and successful in his life. "Right decisions," replied his grandfather. The boy thought for a while and then asked a second question, "But how do you learn to make right decisions?" The grandfather answered quickly with a twinkle in his eye, "Wrong decisions!"
We, too, will learn from our "wrong decisions," our mistakes. Whenever we try anything, there is always the possibility of failure. We must learn to not let this keep us from trying. When we are willing to try, we have already conquered our fear. We can grow no matter what the outcome is.
What failure have I turned into success?
It is often with some difficulty that we come to understand our need for personal boundaries. We also have to struggle to maintain them once they’re defined. Our boundaries are blurred when our desire to be loved and needed by others seduces us into becoming overly involved in their lives. Or when we find ourselves overly committed with tasks and social engagements—even ones we enjoy. We must remember we need time alone, time for the stillness within to nurture us.
Until we detach from the person or the situation that is drawing us in, we can have no objectivity. We also lose our sense of God’s role in our life when our boundaries are blurred. God gives us our direction, our definition, our vision, and our understanding whenever we ask.
I will take time with my Higher Power today to remember my boundaries.
Fear is at the core of codependency. It can motivate us to control situations or neglect ourselves.
Many of us have been afraid for so long that we don’t label our feelings fear. We’re used to feeling upset and anxious. It feels normal. Peace and serenity may be uncomfortable.
At
one time, fear may have been appropriate and useful. We may have relied
on fear to protect ourselves, much the way soldiers in a war rely on
fear to help them survive. But now, in recovery, we’re living life
differently.
