It’s easy to recognize shortcomings like conceit in others. It’s not always so easy to forgive them.
We easily love and accept people who are humble, people who show genuine concern for us and others. We’re naturally drawn to them as role models. We learn from them that positive, spiritually motivated behaviors are possible, even desirable.
But those men and women we turn away from because their unappealing behavior offends us, can teach us lessons that are perhaps even more important. Their efforts to get our attention are usually a distorted, confused cry for love and acceptance that even they might not understand. We are given an opportunity to learn tolerance, patience, forgiveness, and finally—with God’s help—genuine acceptance. Until we can learn love and acceptance for everyone, we won’t be able to fully and freely love and accept even the people we’re drawn to—or ourselves.
Today I will make a special effort to give honest and loving attention to those who are difficult for me to love.
Nature has a lot to teach us. One of these lessons is to stop trying to control everything and “Let go and let God.” Think of a flock of geese flying in a V-formation. What a beautiful sight! How do you think all those geese know what to do? It’s all in the rhythm of the universe.
How does a seed know when to sprout? How do our hearts know when to beat and our lungs know when to breathe? It’s all in the rhythm of the universe.
We each have a rhythm to our lives. We lost it somewhere along the way—perhaps in our active addiction, perhaps earlier. When we move too fast, we waste a lot of energy. When we move too slow,
A young woman at a meeting said something that is often heard from newly recovering people: “Recovery created more problems than I had before.” The more likely reality, of course, for her and for all of us when we’re just starting out, is not that there are so many new problems, but that we are now able to see old problems that we never before saw.
Recovery creates insight—and with insight comes heightened awareness of the need for decisions. Those decisions can hurt.
In recovery we take our worst enemy, addiction, and turn it around. We were ashamed of our addiction. Over time we become proud of our recovery. We were our own worst enemy. Now we’re our own best friend. We are brave people.
Being brave is about facing our fears. Often we think brave people don’t get afraid, but this isn’t true. Brave people learn to stay put, even when their knees are shaking. Many times in recovery, we will want to run when we should stay put. We may even think about using
The same miracle that started our recovery from addiction gave us a chance for a second life. It also brought us a purpose in life. This was something we had lacked for years. This purpose for our life makes it possible to achieve a state of happiness and peace of mind.
This
purpose is to help others. Unless our hearts are filled with the
principles of our new way of life, we are not doing our best. The
spiritual growth that comes from pursuing a purpose in life makes each
day a joy for us and makes our existence worthwhile. Long-timers remind
us,
“Be as enthusiastic about your recovery as you were about your
addiction.”
I never want to say, “This I must do.” I want to say, “This I want to do.” Serving a purpose in life is only a small repayment for the gift of recovery.
I was talking to a friend one day about something I planned to do. Actually, I was worrying about how one particular person might react to what I intended to do.
“What if he doesn’t handle it very well?” I asked.
“Then,” my friend replied, “you’re going to have to handle it well.”
“What if’s” can make us crazy. They put control over our life in someone else’s hands. “What if’s” are a sign that we have reverted to thinking that people have to react in a particular way for us to continue on our course.
