I started a Web Site in 1999 when I came back into the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous. Tripod decided to block me a few years ago , so I stopped writing, posting. SO I decided to take the posts I had there and put them here. Plus new ones I found on the net and shares of my own. Take what you need and pass on the rest! Blessings ds♥

Thursday, May 31, 2012

"Chapter 5 "How It Works" page 67 FEAR--share

 "Chapter 5 "How It Works" page 67  FEAR

 FOOTNOTE: Now for the second part of our inventory.  This manifestation of our character defects is FEAR
“Fear” defined. Webster’s Dictionary defines “fear” as a feeling of alarm or disquiet caused by the expectation of danger, pain, disaster or the like (being found out, being known for what you know or think you are). It is said that the driving force in the life of most alcoholics is the self-centered fear that we will lose something we have or that we will not get something we think we need or want.


from the book  

A Life of My Own: Meditations on Hope and Acceptance

Detachment means "freedom from emotion."  Letting someone else's behavior determine how we feel at every turn is irresponsible. Our emotions should be determined by us, not by someone else. But no doubt we have spent years confusing the boundaries that separate us from other people. Whether at work or at home, we have too often let someone else's "insanity" affect how we behave and how we feel.  At first, it may seem insensitive not to react to others' problems or negative behavior. We may fear they'll think we simply don't care about them. Learning that it is far more caring to let other people handle their own lives takes time and patience. But with practice, it will begin to feel comfortable. In fact, in time it will feel freeing and wonderful.  I will work on detachment today, knowing that in time the rewards will come.

Sunday, May 27, 2012

My share from meeting at StepChat 5/27/12

hello ,Donna S grateful  alcoholic from NJ
 grateful to be here today
 I remember when I came back into the rooms how shaky I was not knowing how or what really to expect except not to drink. I knew I didn't want to drink anymore I had enough. My last drunk I went into a blackout and got in a 5 car accident. I don't remember any thing except talking my way out of it.  I don't miss that life!!  
When I came in I didn't understand how someone changed or what this big book or step book meant . Yes it helped you but it was all words to me but after time by going to lots of meetings and learning to hang with others who had a honest desire to stay sober and listened to the people who had good sobriety. I was also hooked up online in a fobw chat room and met people there but my only issue was I didn't find the Power greater then me that they talked about, so I kept clinging to the wrong people but I also stuck close to the ones who had serenity/sobriety.  

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Be Grateful

Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people
before meeting the right one so that
when we finally meet the right person,
we will know how to be grateful for that gift.

1 Year....As I Reflect Back (1999-2000)

As I reflect back on the past year I can see the progress I have made and
the gratitude I have for this wonderful program and all the "special people" I have met.
On Jan.12 I put down the drink and drug. But I did not surrender to this disease till Jan. 30.1999.

Thats when I came back to the rooms of A.A. to learn how to live life on lifes terms and to work on me.
I was unemployed when I came back( I thank God today ) So I went to alot of meetings. I did a 90&90, got a sponcer and started to work steps.

I had so much fear when I walked back in that first day, a year ago
But that was the first step .I went in sat down and raised my hand found some
words and in a shaking stuttering voice admitted I was an alcoholic.
That I was just coming back after a 5 year run ( i think it was that long, time still is fuzzy)
FEAR was so overwhelming and I wanted to stay inside behind closed doors. I was depressed. Was afraid to be alone with me. So when I was not at a meeting my son (Kris 15 ) found a FOBW chat room on the Internet .Thank God! When not at a meeting I spent hours, days in chat. Learning about people and seeing I was not so unique. There were others all over the world who felt like me, who suffered as I did. It was easier for me to open myself up in this chat room. I found a couple : "Special People" who had what I wanted and I stuck with them . I took the suggestions they offered me, started reading the Big Book.( it is one of my favorite books today) ...listened and became teachable I think for the first time in my life.
My fears are not so great today. I have worked on a 4th and 5th step. I am involved in my home group. Attend as many meetings my health allows me to.Talk to others more openly, freely today. ( my sponcer says I never stop talkin now )I am happy inside where I never thought possible. Not that my life has gotten easier..or my health better.. but.... I have grown inside,, found some peace with me, I ask my HP for help and put my Will in the hands of Gods today. I thank God every morning and night for another day.
I am very Grateful today that I was giving another chance at Life. I found in this past year ..".emotions."... I never felt them..allowed them to show. Today I can cry for joy and sadness. I can hug people today and be hugged. I have learned how to smile inside...now that's what I call progress for this gal .
 I have a lot of work still to do..but ..I,m not that same frightened insecure person I was a year ago..thanks to A.A and the "special people " I have met." One Day At A Time.."

DS 2000 - 1/30/99

Sandy and I are real proud of what you have done and what you have accomplished in this year You can be very proud of yourself and our wishes are for your continued success in recovery ONE DAY AT A TIME WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God's Blessings be with you and your family Love Sandy and Al

OU DID IT :) BILLY (wfl)

How's it feel to be a miracle?

 Congrats Donna. Keep coming back.       Sam (mas52)


Congratulations on your 1st AA anniversary !!!!

Tom Connally in Troy, NY
{Walk softly and carry a Big Book}   "Acceptance is not submission; it is acknowledgment of the facts of a

situation. Then deciding what you're going to do about it."

-- Kathleen Casey Theisen


A great story from the first edition of the big book. Not included in
get over to an occasional man who may be in my position. Partner in one of this country's national
the current edition. A DIFFERENT SLANT I probably have one of the shortest stories in this whole volume and it is short because there is only one point I wish to only know concerns, happily married with fine children, sufficient income to indulge my whims and future security from the financial standpoint should paint a picture in which there would be no possibility of a man becoming an alcoholic from the psychological standpoint. I had nothing to escape from and I am known as a conservative, sound business man. I had missed going to my office several times while I tapered off and
mous and asked if I wanted one of them to call upon me. I was sure
brought myself to sobriety. This time, though, I found I could not taper off, I could not stop and I had to be hospitalized. That was the greatest shock to my pride I ever had. Such a blow that I made a firm resolve to never again taste as much as one glass of beer. Careful thought and analysis went into that decision. The doctor at this hospital told me vaguely of the work of men who called themselves Alcoholics Anon y I needed no outside help, but in order to be polite to the doctor and hoping he would forget it, I assented. I was embarrassed when a chap called at my house one evening and told me about himself. He quickly sensed my slight resentment and made it plain to me that none of the crowd were missionaries, nor did they feel it their duty to try to help anyone who did not want help. I think I closed the talk by saying I was glad I was not an alcoholic and sorry he had been bothered by me.
Within sixty days, after leaving the hospital the second time, I was pounding at his door, willing to do anything to conquer the vicious thing that had conquered me. The point I hope I have made is - even a man with everything from a material standpoint, a man with tremendous pride and the will power to function in all ordinary circumstances can become an alcoholic and find himself as hopeless and helpless as the man who has a multitude of worries and troubles. --Harry B.
First Edition of Big Book pages 252-253.

A New Life

Is sobriety all that we are to expect of a spiritual awakening?
 No, sobriety is only a bare beginning; it is only the first gift of the first awakening. If more gifts are to be received, our awakening has to go on. As it does go on, we find that bit by bit we can discard the old life -- the one that did not work -- for a new life that can and does work under any conditions whatever.

I Asked God.....

I asked God to take

away my habit.

God said, No. 

It is not for me to take away, but for you to give it up.

I asked God to make my handicapped child whole.

God said, No.

 His spirit is whole, his body is only temporary

A Power Greater Then Myself--share

I learned being around the rooms of A.A. for 4 years prior to coming back this time, that I had to find a power greater then myself in order to grow. I never got this when I first entered the rooms and as a result I was domed to repeat.
I thought I could find an easier way on my own, but as always my way got me drunk. Before entering the rooms this time I had what is know as a spiritual awaking.


When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation -- some fact of my life -- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.

We don't have to drink to die.

 We buried him yesterday. The County Coroner had published the required notices for next of kin and nobody had claimed the body. It was just myself and his sponsor, no preacher even, the county doesn't pay for those. 
Not much of a send-off, and not the one David had asked for. A cheap coffin, backhoe dug a hole, and that was it - another old AA gone. 
He had been sober over 20 years and in AA over 30, a stern and rigid man who tried to soften his edges and never could. 
He was a loner, a fringe-er, an isolated man at the edge of life's good things. He hung in there... and in the end hung himself. I don't know why; I can't know. 
I know there had been a diagnosis of senile dementia, and I know that the doctor had added cancer to the list. But, I've seen AA’s deal with such things before... I don't know why David decided he couldn't. 



"And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today.
When I am disturbed, it is because I find
some person, place, thing, or situation
- some fact of my life -
unacceptable to me, and I can find
no serenity until I accept that person,
place, thing, or situation as being exactly
the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
Nothing, absolutely nothing happens
in God's world by mistake.
Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober;
unless I accept life completely on life's terms,
I cannot be happy.
I need to concentrate not so much on what
needs to be changed in the world
as on what needs to be changed
in me and in my attitudes."

Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 417 4th Edition
Note: Dr. Paul O., author of these words, passed away 5.12.00.