I started a Web Site in 1999 when I came back into the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous. Tripod decided to block me a few years ago , so I stopped writing, posting. SO I decided to take the posts I had there and put them here. Plus new ones I found on the net and shares of my own. Take what you need and pass on the rest! Blessings ds♥

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Gratitude



Gratitude

God has been gracious enough to give me sober days
and a life blessed with peace and contentment,
as well as the ability to give and receive love,
and the opportunity to serve others -- in our Fellowship, my family
and my community.
For all of this, I have "a full and thankful heart."

- Daily Reflections, p. 93


Thought to Ponder . . .

I am grateful for this minute; my eternity may be in it.


AA-related 'Alconym' . . .

A A = Always Awesome.

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Big Book Quote pg 84

Big Book Quote 




"Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We
discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone
we can help. Love and tolerance of others is our code."

Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th Edition, Into Action, pg. 84

Saturday, September 29, 2012

The main problem with my will.....







The main problem with my will is that it is first and foremost about me. It tricks me into believing that if I take care of my wants first, then I'll be able to help another -- of course I usually find out that my wants are insatiable, and I quickly become lost in their demands. God's will, on the other hand, is usually about helping others and with what's right for all concerned -- the whole picture in which I am just part. While this seems backwards to me at times, I always find out that when I'm able to surrender to God's will, my real wants and needs are met and exceeded in ways I never could have imagined.

If I'm feeling hysterical, it must be historical





"If I'm feeling hysterical, it must be historical."

Before recovery, I often wondered why little things caused such a big reaction in me. Somebody driving too slow, other people's comments, little things not going my way - these events often caused big reactions in me and left me confused and with a painful emotional hangover.

Today though, I've learned to look beyond these events and to what they trigger in me. And what I uncover are the old wounds and hurts from long ago - the historical causes of my hysterical reactions. And once I'm able to see events as the 'buttons' they are, my real emotional recovery can begin.

Today I use questions to help identify and heal old wounds. "What's really behind this reaction?" "What can I do right now to sooth myself?" "Where's the recovery here?" All these wonderful questions are tools I now use to help me heal and so avoid these bigger than life reactions. Today I uncover, discover and heal old hurts.

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Seven Deadly Sins Definitions




1. Pride - A sense of one's own proper dignity or value; self-respect. Arrogant or disdainful conduct or treatment; haughtiness. An excessively high opinion of oneself; conceit. It’s spiritual opposite is humility. Seeing ourselves as we are and not comparing ourselves to others is humility.

Friday, September 7, 2012

Reason, Season, And A Lifetime





People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you figure out which it is, you will know exactly what to do.

Some people come into our lives and quickly go..

Some people become friends and stay awhile...

leaving beautiful footprints on our hearts...

Sunday, September 2, 2012

Topics are 1) friendship in AA 2) gratitude 3) staying sober through grief




  Donna S grateful recovering alcoholic   NJ
 
Gratitude.... I have such gratitude for the time I had with Mae ♥
She was an inspiration to me and so many others in this room...
She was always there for me ... such a giving lady who taught me mpre
 about patience and tolerance she showed me and others that it IS possible to get and stay sober in this room she was a big part of our Big Book Study Meeting and she is SO missed...but she WILL live forever in my heart!!!! ♥
Thank you Tina for ur tribute to Mae on ur blog ♥

Thursday, August 30, 2012

IN THE SPIRIT OF FELLOWSHIP



-- God speaks through other people.
-- All recovery roads lead to the ability to love and be loved.

-- Recovery is the process of "recovering" who we are.
-- The greatest gift we can give anyone is our full attention. 
-- Recovery isn't a death sentence -- it's a LIFE sentence

MIRACLES HAPPEN





-- Give God permission
-- Don't give up before the miracle. 
-- God hasn't brought us this far just to drop us. 
-- God, thank you for all that comes to me without my efforts


Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Step Twelve



Click to Read

 Step Twelve "Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs."

 hiya Donna S grateful alcoholic ..........from NJ

Carry the Message





P.R.O.G.R.A.M. – People Relying On God Relaying A Message


Carry the Message that Recovery Works - not the Mess

If you’re not grateful for your sobriety, you will not stay sober.

This is a program for people who want it, not people who need it.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Unity , Into Action



For me without the Unity of the fellowship I wouldn't be able to take the proper action needed to change and find freedom of self. It isn't easy, but I find with out Unity we have no meetings, no fellowship,  and I would probably  be dead.

Self Worth & Acceptance



Self Worth is something I never had.....
I had a parent who told me from early on I never amount to anything
and I had teachers tell me I never measure up to my brothers. After a while you believe it ,especially when bad things happen to you and are told that's why your no good.

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Special Friends



Thank you For Listening to me, When I needed Someone to hear. 
I could always Count on You To lend A sympathetic ear. 
Thank you For Standing by me, When I needed Support. 
I could always Count on You For a clear And Honest rapport.
Thank you For Being 'square' with me, When I lied to myself. 
My friend You Opened my eyes To the truth,
When I felt There was nothing left 

Sunday, August 5, 2012

Resentment- my share




Resentment causes no harm to the subject of it’s obsession, but it’s like a mental cancer to the person under its control. It’s such a threat to happiness and peace of mind that the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous mentions it in at least five places. Here’s what it has to say:


“Never forget that resentment is a deadly hazard to an alcoholic.”
 BB p.117, To Wives 

“Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear.”
 BB p.84, Into Action 

“It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness.” 
BB p.66, How It Works 

“Resentment is the ‘number one’ offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick.” 
BB p.64, How It Works 

‘The greatest enemies of us alcoholics are resentment, jealousy, envy, frustration, and fear.” 
BB p.145, To Employers


**************

 hello everyone   Donna S grateful alcoholic from NJ

Resentments is one i can't afford to have.... but I get them.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Big Book pg 76-82 -my share Step 6 thru 9


Click to Read
pg 76-82


Donna S grateful Alcoholic from NJ


 Starting back with Step 6.... I reailzed that if I didn't have a good connection with a higher power that I would have trouble with Step 6, 7, 8, & 9 which I did the first time I did the Step work. I didn't really get Step 3 so my 4th & 5th were half heartily, so when I got to Step 6 the second time I redid my steps, I understood I had to Pray again for more willingness. That's all I had to do and look at the defects  I had which I found in my 4th step. By now I basically knew which defects were very troublesome . I KNEW if I continued with those defects I WAS going to drink , as I almost did, as i have mentioned many times in here.  I found I had to have a total willingness to let them go in Step7.  I had to ask my Higher Power to take them from me.... meaning I had to LET THEM GO.

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Chapter 5 How It works -pg 67-68 - FEAR



Click to read


Donna S grateful alcoholic from NJ

When I got to this part of the 4th step I was like, I KNOW THIS,
I LIVE IN IT.
Fear froze me for a very long time and drinking helped me to not have fear
so it was a reason to drink, as I can do anything with a drink.
I was in so much fear I couldn't talk to people with out a drink.
I couldn't walk the dog with out a drink or go to the park with my kids with
out a 6 pack and bottle of J.D. and then I was miss chatty,OVER CHATTY

Over time we stopped going out as I couldn't handle my drinking. I would be brought home by the police, which wasn't good as we were in politics in town.
So I drank at home, only going out to go to get my beer and J.D.

Chapter 5 How it Works- page 63-67 Resentments


click to read

Donna S. grateful alcoholic

When I first was introduced to the step 4 I was clueless and my sponsor was even more clueless. She read the big book to me ...Step 4
and then handed me a bunch of work sheets and said fill them out
no direction, no if u have a problem ask. I coped a resentment lol

SO I eventually asked someone I saw change and she mentioned she did the steps over and would take me threw. We read this part of the big book and she told me to write out all the people, institutions and principles I knew.

I went down my list of people and wrote thier name ,then the cause of why I was resentful in 7 words or less ,that when we did the 5th step I could get more into detail. Then what it effected, Self-esteem (fear), Security, Our Ambitions, Personal relationships, pocketbook, Sex relations, or pride.

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Chapter 2 THERE IS A SOLUTION


click to listen

Hello everyone Donna S grateful alcoholic from NJ

I love this Chapter, as it tells me..a hopeless alcoholic, that there IS a solution.

It is here in the big book that tells me I am not alone and there are others like me...and they have found that solution and are here to help me.
Not yell at me or tell me I am no good and i dont care or I ruin everything
or I will never amount to anything. They are here to tell me it is OK, weve been in your shoes and we found a way out. You don't ever have to drink again, if you are willing to grow along spiritual lines with the 12 Steps.

The Meeting-by Bill Wilson



Bill Wilson Meets Dr. Bob Smith and Alcoholics Anonymous is born. Narrated by Bill Wilson

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Diary of Two Motorcycle Hobos





By Lois Wilson


Introduction

Bill and I were married during World War I, and after he returned from France, he wasn't sure in what field of endeavor he wanted to earn his living.  He had taken an electrical engineering course at Norwich University, a military college in Vermont, but, because of the war, did not graduate.  His grandfather, with whom he lived after the divorce of his mother and father, wanted him to become a lawyer.
So, after a succession of unsatisfactory jobs, either to him or to his boss, and while employed by the United States Fidelity and Guaranty Co., he took a night law course at the Brooklyn Law School.  His job as investigator of theft had shown him much of the seamy side of the law and dissuaded him from becoming a lawyer.  He finished the law course, however, and paid for his diploma, but never bothered to pick it up.
He had been interested for some time in the stock market, and in why people buy into companies that they know nothing about, gambling with stocks as they would with chips in a Casino.  Would it not be much safer and surer if investors knew something about the companies into which they were buying?
When his grandfather wanted to purchase a cow, he went to look at the cow, feel its legs, inquire about how much milk it gave, its age and forebears, etc.  Why shouldn't this same principle be applied to the buying of stocks?
Feeling he was just the man to do the investigating, Bill consulted with several friends on Wall Street, but, finding no one enthusiastic about his ideas, and knowing the proof of the pudding is in the eating, he decided to take a year out to test his theory.

Sunday, July 15, 2012

90 Days







HI my name is Donna and I am an alcoholic

I started using at a very young age. Drinking just seemed a way of life from early on. It took me out of ME. I was afraid of my own shadow all my life. Alcohol and drugs made me feel like I was someone. Little did I realize it just robbed me from living. I was a people pleaser all my life, always in fear of not being accepted. I was robbed of my childhood at an early age and just never seemed to fit in anywhere. All I ever wanted was to be loved but at the same time I wanted to be left alone. Depression and suicide played on my mind a lot . My first attempt at suicide was in 6th grade with a plastic knife. All that got me was a trip to Gray Stone ( State mental Hospital) for over night.

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

3 years






Why I Got Sober On 1/30/99


Hi my name is DonnaS. and I am an Alcoholic,

I got Sober on 1/30/99 as I was sick and tired of being so sick and tired!.
I didn't want to live, but I no longer wanted to die.
I had first come into the rooms of AA in 1987 , but I came in for all the wrong reasons.
MY husband was  going to leave me and take our 2 sons. He told me either I go to rehab and get help or he and the kids were gone. So I went to a rehab and went to meetings but..
I didn't want what you people had. I had reservations and ended up going back to drugs at first, thinking it was ok, as I was an Alcoholic not a druggie, little did I know soon I was drinking again.
In that time I was out there, I overdosed 2 times, but I still was not ready to surrender to this disease. It took me many years before I finally had enough.

Saturday, July 7, 2012

MY Share on THERE IS A SOLUTION- page 23-29-


Click to Read


Donna S. grateful alcoholic,

What stuck out for me was ...HOPE. There's hope for me to not pick up that first drink, hope for a better way of living then the way i was. I was a dry drunk for a 4 years back in 1987. I know that feeling of doom when u stop drinking. I had no tools or design for living. I mean it was there , I went to meetings and  rehab but i didn't want them. I lived in the insanity, mental torture in my head waiting it out till i could drink again. Thinking this time I will be ok, I wont drink like i did before, that i could handle it this time.

As we are changed by our experiences




. . . that is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way.
—Doris Lessing


As we are changed by our experiences, that which we know also changes. Our experiences foster growth and enlightenment, and all awarenesses give way to new understandings. We are forever students of life blessed with particular lessons designed only for us. There is joy in knowing that learning has no end and that each day offers us a chance to move closer to becoming the persons we are meant to be.

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Choosing Love and Life

  



 There are plenty of times in life when we would rather not have to make decisions; the alternatives are too painful or the responsibilities too heavy. In such situations we may procrastinate or become very passive, but there is still choices that we make. To "decide not to decided" is still a decision. We might adopt rigid institutional values, adhere to frozen policies, or even join cults to avoid the responsibilities that come with making our own choices, but avoiding responsibility is also a choice. Freedom and responsibility are perfect boomerangs; they keep coming back to us no matter how or where we try to throw them away. The one thing we are never free to choose is choicelessness.

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Firing your old God





 One day I heard a new man in the program talking to an old-timer about the Third Step. The new man said, " No way I'm going to turn my life over to God. He'd ruin me-and I deserve it." He went on to say that for him God was a giant policeman.
  The old-timer, a strong quiet man, listened to the new man's description of God and then said, " You ought to fire that God. You've got the wrong God for this program, friend. The God who operates here is loving, forgiving and always be there for you. I had a God like yours when I first came in here, but I had to fire him and get me a new God."
  All my theological buzzers went off. I thoughts, "Fire God... We're dealing with Ultimate Reality here, friends. You just can't fire God and get a new one."

Monday, July 2, 2012

Constructive Anger- and my share






Living in a relationship with other people means that we will experience seasons of anger. Anger is a normal human emotion. It is an unavoidable ingredient of any fellowship.

Unfortunately, for most of us anger is a problem. We know that anger can lead to destructive behaviors. Some of us have been on the receiving end of verbal and physical attacks from an angry person. And some of us have lashed out at others with our anger. So we fear anger because we have seen the destruction which results when anger leads to sin. We have seen how anger can damage relationships and lead to loneliness.

Sunday, July 1, 2012

CHARACTER BUILDING



Demands made upon other people for too
much attention, protection, and
love can only invite domination or revulsion. . . .
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 44

When I uncovered my need for approval in the Fourth Step,
I didn't think it should rank as a character defect.
I wanted to think of it more as an asset
(that is, the desire to please people).
It was quickly pointed out to me
that this "need" can be very crippling.

Came to Believe in a power greater than myself


 

"A.A. is a spiritual program and a spiritual way of life. Even the first half of the First Step, 'We admitted we were powerless over alcohol,' is a spiritual experience. An A.A. member needs more than physical capabilities; he needs to use his full faculties as a human being to hear the message, to think about it, to review the effects of the past, to realize, to admit, and to accept. These processes are activities of the mind, which is part of the spirit."

Topics-Unity and Attitude-my share




Hello Donna S grateful alcoholic from NJ

Tradition One—“Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. unity."

With out unity I would be drunk or dead.
I found out I cant do this alone and I need the fellowship.
I need others to help me when i am lost, not sure, feeling alone,have a question, and to help me grow along spiritual lines.
Attitude is a biggy and I always had a crumby attitude. I saw black never white.
One of the things i was told was lose the attitude
when i first came in i went to rehab and after a while we had to fill out these ditto sheets about the other people in room

Thursday, June 28, 2012

PROGRESSIVE GRATITUDE




Smile and remember how blessed you really are!



PROGRESSIVE GRATITUDE

Gratitude should go forward, rather than backward. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 29

I am very grateful that my Higher Power has given me a second chance to live a worthwhile life. Through Alcoholics Anonymous, I have been restored to sanity. The promises are being fulfilled in my life. I am grateful to be free from the slavery of alcohol. I am grateful for peace of mind and the opportunity to grow, but my gratitude should go forward rather than backward. I cannot stay sober on yesterday's meetings or past Twelfth-Step calls; I need to put my gratitude into action today. Our co-founder said our gratitude can best be shown by carrying the message to others. Without action, my gratitude is just a pleasant emotion. I need to put it into action by working Step Twelve, by carrying the message and practicing the principles in all my affairs. I am grateful for the chance to carry the message today!
from the book Daily Reflections

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

TWELVE CONCEPTS FOR WORLD SERVICE




I
The final responsibility and the ultimate authority for A.A. world services should always reside in the collective conscience of our whole Fellowship.

II
When, in 1955, the A.A. groups confirmed the permanent charter for their General Service Conference, they thereby delegated to the Conference complete authority for the active maintenance of our world services and thereby made the Conference -- excepting for any change in the Twelve Traditions or in Article 12 of the Conference Charter -- the actual voice and the effective conscience for our whole Society.

III
As a traditional means of creating and maintaining a clearly defined working relation between the groups, the Conference, the A.A. General Service Board and its several service corporations, staffs, committees, and executives, and of thus insuring their effective leadership, it is here suggested that we endow each of these elements of world service with a traditional "Right of Decision."

What is Alcoholics Anonymous?



ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS is a fellowship designed and administered by a bunch of ex-drunks whose only qualifications for membership are that they can't hold their liquor and have decided they don't want to learn how. Not that they could anyway, they never could, and it's highly unlikely that they ever would. It has no rules, dues or fees, nor anything else that any sensible organization seems to require.

At meetings, the speaker starts on one subject, winds up talking about something entirely different, and concludes by saying he doesn't know anything about the program except that it works. The groups are always broke, yet always seem to have money to carry on. They are always losing members but seem to grow. They claim AA is a selfish program but they always seem to be trying to give it away and to do something for others.

Slogans from around the rooms




90 meetings in 90 days

A. A. also stands for: "Attitude Adjustment."

An Attitude of Gratitude.

A slip begins long before the first drink.

AA is not for those who need it, it's for those who want it.

Act as if.

Action not distraction

“Bill W.,” Documentary

Sunday, June 24, 2012

Working With Others ( share)



Step Twelve Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

This chapter, which is called "Working With Others", gives us the part of Step Twelve that deals only with ways to carrying this message to other alcoholics. When WE work with others, OUR lives change. we don't help another alcoholic because THEIR sick, we help another alcoholic because WE are sick, and part of our program of recovery is that we need to be helping others.


God please help me




God please help me to not live in denial today. Help me to see myself and my actions as they truly are. Help me to see these shortcomings as a starting point to becoming better. Help me to be willing to be let go of these things that keep me from wanting to let go. Help me to remember that I would rather be happy than right. Help me to let go of this fear of what people may think of me, of not being good enough. Help me to remember that I am here to serve you not self and this world and in that everything is okay. Help me to be better today than I was yesterday. Thank You 

~~~~~~

God please help me to remember that other people may be spiritually sick. Help me to remember that I may act the exact same way in their situation. Help me to be accepting of them. Please help me to not be judgmental, to remember we are all human. God, thank you for this day and the many opportunities that lie inherent within in it. Give me wisdom and strength to embrace these opportunities. Thank you for a life that is far better than what I imagined for myself. Thank You 

~~~~~~

Friday, June 22, 2012

God-guided life



A.A. Thought for the Day 

In A.A. we have three things: fellowship, faith, and service.
Fellowship is wonderful, but its wonder lasts just so long.
Then some gossip, disillusionment, and boredom may come in.
Worry and fear come back at times and we find that fellowship
is not the whole story. Then we need faith. When we're alone,
with no- body to pat us on the back, we must turn to God for
help. Can I say "Thy will be done" - and mean it?

Meditation for the Day 

Thursday, June 21, 2012

12 Years


I am so truly blessed!!!!! I celebrated 12 years of sobriety on Jan. 30th. 2011.. It is only through God's grace that I am here today. He saved me from the gripping chains of alcoholism and then in 2005 I gave my life totally to Jesus! (2 Corinthians 5:17) (Psalm 16:9) What brought me to finally totally surrendering was ,even though I was sober for 6 years, I wasn't changing much. I was still sinning in some ways and I was not happy with where I was at.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Traditions



"The Twelve Traditions point straight at many of our individual defects. By implication they ask each of us to lay aside pride and resentments. They ask for personal as well as group sacrifice. They ask us never to use the AA name in any quest for personal power or distinction or money. The Traditions guarantee the equality of all members and the independence of all groups. They show how we may best relate ourselves to each other and to the world outside."
Bill W., 1967AAWS, Alcoholics Anonymous Comes of Age, p. 96

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Prayers









in Big Book & 12 & 12






MORNING PRAYER 
God direct my thinking today so that it be divorced of self pity, dishonesty, self-will, self-seeking and fear. God inspire my thinking, decisions and intuitions. Help me to relax and take it easy. Free me from doubt and indecision. Guide me through this day and show me my next step. God give me what I need to take care of any problems. I ask all these things that I may be of maximum service to you and my fellow man in the name of the Steps I pray. AMEN
(p. 86 BB)


Things To Always Remember...and One Thing To Never Forget




Your presence is a present to the world.
You're unique and one of a kind.
Your life can be what you want it to be.
Take the days just one at a time.

Count your blessings, not your troubles.
You'll make it through whatever comes along.
Within you are so many answers.
Understand, have courage, be strong.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Chapter 11 - "A Vision for You"-Share



Donna S grateful alcoholic from NJ

Grateful for another day and the big book and those who have gone before me to help me in my journey

For me this chapter reviews the experience strength & hope of how it works.
Coming in I was so hopeless, broken and desperate to stop drinking.  I lost my values ,my zest for life & my spirituality.

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Topics ,"Finding who we are with out drinking", & "Complacency"




Hello everyone Donna S alcoholic here in NJ

"Finding who we are with out drinking" , for me took time...I am slow.
I didn't know how to live or for that matter who i was.
I been drinking since i was 9. I do know I am a better person.
Who am I with out a drink....Alot of things once the fog clears,and I stop fighting everything and I let go let God.
I am a responsible person.
I am faithful wife today.
I am a better mother, sister, daughter, & friend.
I am honest, kind, giving and loving.
I found out that if I dont pick up a drink, my world can be amazing.

I am your disease




Hello,

Just in case you forgot me, I am your disease:

I Hate meetings...I Hate higher powers...I Hate anyone who has a program. To all who come in contact with me, I wish you death and I wish you suffering.

Allow me to introduce myself, I am the disease of addiction. I Am cunning, baffling, and powerful. That's Me. I have killed millions and I am pleased.

Sunday, June 10, 2012

When the 12 Steps are applied – and practiced,



They will:

Remove the mental obsession with alcohol.

Eliminate the emotional compulsion to drink

Produce a personality change – necessary for recovery

Produce a new attitude and outlook on life

Step 6 & 7--share





 Donna S grateful recovering alcoholic from NJ

These 2 steps  are the shortest steps in the big book.
When I first did step work I hadn't a clue what charactor defects were. How could I ? no one ever told me about them , they just said I was selfish, self-centered, dishonest, etc.  I  just thought I was drinking to much, that the people in my life just wanted to me to stop drinking  OK  i did that when i came back in the rooms in 1999 . I was fortunate that the desire to drink left me pretty quick but then my sponsor said i needed to stop acting out. Hmm,  well define that please....but see I didn't ask questions i went to meetings and listend as best i could in the early days, that's about all i was capable of doing.  As as time went on  and my second sponsor took me threw the steps,  she told me what my