I started a Web Site in 1999 when I came back into the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous. Tripod decided to block me a few years ago , so I stopped writing, posting. SO I decided to take the posts I had there and put them here. Plus new ones I found on the net and shares of my own. Take what you need and pass on the rest! Blessings ds♥

Wednesday, July 18, 2012


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Hello everyone Donna S grateful alcoholic from NJ

I love this Chapter, as it tells me..a hopeless alcoholic, that there IS a solution.

It is here in the big book that tells me I am not alone and there are others like me...and they have found that solution and are here to help me.
Not yell at me or tell me I am no good and i dont care or I ruin everything
or I will never amount to anything. They are here to tell me it is OK, weve been in your shoes and we found a way out. You don't ever have to drink again, if you are willing to grow along spiritual lines with the 12 Steps.
  "Not only is a spiritual experience possible, it is a guarantee. Just keep an open mind and take the Steps as described in the Big Book." 
" there is no middle-of-the-road solution." 
 What comforting words to this alkie. 

You told me I had an illness, where alcohol physically poisons my body and mentally controls my thinking, making me crave more alcohol.

It tells me that this book has answers to all my questions. For me that was a bit of a problem as I have a comprehension problem BUT then I was told it is ok we will help you as long as I am willing, which i was. To finally find people who understood me and that were willing to help me was such a comforting feeling. It took me time to fully get this but I did and that's the point for me. I stumbled along the way but i didn't drink. I stuck to people like it said who found the solution and were working a program who were happy joyous and free from alcohol and living life on life's terms.

I am a real alcoholic, I cant drink period.

I knew i had a problem with drinking when i was in high school but i didn't understand the physical and mental angle of it. I cant have a couple and be done. I mean, I did but down the road a week or a month I was drunk again, I was back to living a life for the drink.

I was selfish every time I drank,as life was all about me. I put the drink before my husband, my kids, my family and friends.

I think about it and shudder at the thought of all the crap I put them all through. I didn't see the selfishness then, but I sure did when I started really understanding this illness. 

I am grateful I don't have to be the person I was but I know it is a arms length away if i forget to do what i need everyday

I might not pick up right away but i know in my mind i will eventually.
ds 1/30/99

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