Be careful with amends.

Hurting someone thoughtlessly just to lift our own guilt is not a proper Step Nine. Amends are for rebuilding the burned bridges in our lives. But if amends will hurt someone, we must decide if it's in that person's best interest to be told now. Oftentimes it's best left unsaid, but never denied to ourselves or to God.

Changing our behavior intentionally is one part of making amends, particularly to family members who may have heard us say "I'm sorry" far too many times.

Repaying money, repairing damages, and making charitable contributions on behalf of the person we have

Big Book pg 76-82 -my share Step 6 thru 9

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pg 76-82

Donna S grateful Alcoholic from NJ


 Starting back with Step 6.... I reailzed that if I didn't have a good connection with a higher power that I would have trouble with Step 6, 7, 8, & 9 which I did the first time I did the Step work. I didn't really get Step 3 so my 4th & 5th were half heartily, so when I got to Step 6 the second time I redid my steps, I understood I had to Pray again for more willingness. That's all I had to do and look at the defects  I had which I found in my 4th step. By now I basically knew which defects were very troublesome . I KNEW if I continued with those defects I WAS going to drink , as I almost did, as i have mentioned many times in here.  I found I had to have a total willingness to let them go in Step7.  I had to ask my Higher Power to take them from me.... meaning I had to LET THEM GO.